Sorting Labels / Introduction


© Li Sam Writing. All rights reserved.

Both consciously and unconsciously we group people into categories, labeling them according to their looks and behavior. For many reasons we seem to need to organize people this way.

Whether our labels are appropriate or not, do the labels themselves really matter?

This labeling practice is quite strange because labels mostly emanate from the people doing the labeling, not the people being labeled, so the definitions can vary greatly. Plus, not a lot rides on what labels we choose for others (not for ourselves, at least), so we’re not always careful about how we categorize others. The only time we do care is when we ourselves are labeled by others. Whether our label is right or wrong could be vital for our well-being. We might not want to be related to a group because we think of ourselves differently, but how do we set ourselves apart?

Whatever labels we are blessed with or bullied with, right or wrong, they are based on what other people want to believe, and they reflect their thinking. To persuade a person to believe differently can be quite hard, and to persuade a person against his or her will most certainly is impossible. And then there is group pressure: Whatever the group says, others must believe it and follow suit.

If you find yourself with a label that doesn’t fit but no one around you can see (or wants to see) that you’ve been mislabeled, there is only one way out: denial. And that’s more common than we as individuals and society are willing to admit. In general, people who mislabel others don’t like to admit their mistakes, so they add their own denial to their problems in order to escape embarrassment. This type of denying, not being true to oneself, in the end could be disastrous—not just to the mislabeled person—but to the person doing the labeling and to people who believe in it.

However, we do develop—for better or worse, whatever—we actually do change! We come up with new labels, and we rearrange and reposition our understandings, trying to gain ground by sorting labels the way we think they best reflect our new will and understanding of reality.

Sorting labels—well what about it? In all this sorting, have we made it possible to, as individuals, have a say in our own labels? Not really. You can vary your status within the label you have been assigned, like being more or less one way or another, but changing the label itself is quite a different story.

But what about our true selves, who we really are, not what we want to be like or look like? Are there labels reflecting that? If there are, do we find those in the first labels we’ve been branded with from childhood, or maybe the most recent ones as we try to make ourselves fit into or out of stereotypes today? What about priority—where to start—what labels come first? Which label is the most important one? Are there labels that other labels are based on, like a never-ending chain you can’t escape from and have to drag through life? What are the most important characteristics about us as human beings; what matters the most?

Well, I dare say that gender is the foundation, the most important label that every other label relies on and relates to. But identifying gender is easier said than done. What is gender, boy versus girl, man verses woman? What we think of as obvious actually is quite subtle and complicated. Regardless of how much money we spend to announce our genders and how hard we try to make the border more distinctive separating our gender from the other, we can’t separate them entirely, cleanly. Life just doesn’t work like that.

What psychiatry, healthcare, and science are presenting as the truth doesn’t always add up.

So whatever labels we produce and believe in, we need to sort out and recognize the basic variables in order to build our understanding of people: who they are and who we are, which is what this chapter, “Sorting Labels,” and the following one, “Sorting Gender,” are all about.

This sorting labels chapter is divided into five entries, each released from the following Tuesday to Saturday. Please feel free to comment and add to all our understanding.

Best regards,

Li Sam